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It's Ruff Being Hairy

I often get asked by my owner "What's it like being so hairy?" I'd like to answer her sometime, but the language barrier conflicts. All I can say is that it's "ruff."

Of course there are obvious pros i.e. you never have to put a coat on to go outside, you never have nightmares about turning up to school naked, you're rarely ever cold, you never have to worry about wrinkles, and people like to touch you because of all that hair.

But do you ever consider the cons? It's ever so hot in the summer and you can't just remove your hair, bugs love to play hide and seek and they are so hard to find, it gets tangled and matted (similar to what humans call dreadlocks - though I do love Bob Marley, now that's a cool dog), it makes my butt look ten times as big (does this fur look fat on me?), often leaves get caught in my fur when I go for a nice autumnal walk, when my tear ducks tear, it leaves a stain on my hair, there is always some food stuck around my mouth that I can't wipe off with my paw, and people are always trying to touch me because of all that hair.

Despite all that, I wouldn't give my hair up for anything. It's a beautiful salt and pepper which I believe distinguishes me as an intellectual (right, Einstein?) and have you seen those hairless cats!!!